I am so tired of seeing these waif skinny women in bikinis walking around my club pool.  I spent a lot of time finding the perfect suit to show off my “Ass”ets and now I have to contend with them!! I just wish some fat bitches would show up in a thong and make me look like the only piece of meat on a veggie buffet. 

Adios-

Lola

Last night I was out being my naughty little self, when I spot the hottest man I have seen in a long time.  I did the across the room looks, the laugh and hair flip, and even had the waitress deliver a drink to him.  I was pulling out all the stops because I knew tonight he would be mine! After he received the drink he came over to me, my heart was pounding and I know I was smiling ear to ear.  He was 6 foot 2, black hair, olive skin, green eyes and a smile that killed.  He came right up to me and said “Girl that was so sweet of you, by the way I can’t believe you got the new prada bag” OMG I could have died.  Wow my radar was off.  So the man I thought would be my new latin lover became my new best drinking friend and we spent the rest of the night hitting on the gays. 

Adios-

Lola

The fourth of July is always a great holiday in the US.  Parties, sun and fun, fireworks.  I was for sure there would be fireworks in my bed that night but instead me and Mr. Grumpy got in a big damn fight and my entire night was ruined.  How was I to know that a thong bikini wasn’t appropriate at his parents BBQ and that his grandma didn’t know how to do tequila shots?  He so overreacted, that Bastard!! I still had a great night, don’t remember the last part of it, but granny and I finished a fifth on our own. 

Adios-

Lola